The Waters of Love

A course of introductory lectures

on love, sexuality, marriage, and friendship

by Dr. Stephen Palmquist

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Table of Contents

Preface. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .viii

PART ONE: H2O OCEANS

THE METAPHYSICS OF LOVE

Week I. The Dream of Persons in Relation

Lecture 1. What is Love? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .2

Lecture 2. Dreamtime, Knowledge, and the Origin of Love. . . . . . . . .9

Lecture 3. Philopsychy: Love as a Whole Person Quest . . . . . . . . . . .15

Week II. Rational Love: Two Fountainheads

Lecture 4. Love as Eros . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .24

Lecture 5. Love as Agape. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .28

Lecture 6. Toward a Creative Synthesis . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .35

Week III. Emotional Love: Two Forms

Lecture 7. The Rise of Romance in Courtly Love . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .45

Lecture 8. Parental Love and the Kinship Bond . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .51

Lecture 9. Freedom, Death, and the Metaphysics of Love . . . . . . . . .59

PART TWO: STEAM CLOUDS

THE LOGIC OF SEXUALITY

Week IV. The Alchemy of Sex

Lecture 10. Conceptualizing Sex: Love vs. Pleasure . . . . . . . . . . . . . .68

Lecture 11. Love’s Chemistry: Attraction and Orgasm. . . . . . . . . . . .76

Lecture 12. Touching and the Significance of the Skin . . . . . . . . . . . .83

Week V. Sexual Politics

Lecture 13. Sexuality, Love, and the Origin of the Psyche . . . . . . . . .92

Lecture 14. Seductive Power: Self-Love and the Stare . . . . . . . . . . . .98

Lecture 15. Sadism, “Good” Sex, and Sexual Perversion . . . . . . . . .107

Week VI. Spirituality and Sex

Lecture 16. Tantra, Sexual Mysticism, and Sex Cults . . . . . . . . . . . .118

Lecture 17. Sex in the Bible: Knowing and Being Like God . . . . . . .125

Lecture 18. Divine Seduction as the Antidote to Death . . . . . . . . . . .133

PART THREE: ICE CONDENSATIONS

THE SCIENCE OF MARRIAGE

Week VII. From the Ideal to the Real

Lecture 19. The Nature and Purpose of Marriage . . . . . . . . . . . . . .142

Lecture 20. Marriage as a Crucible for Self-Development . . . . . . . .149

Lecture 21. Biblical Covenants: Polygamy vs. Celibacy . . . . . . . . . .157

Week VIII. The Paradox of Conjugal Love

Lecture 22. Conventional Marriage and its Alternatives . . . . . . . . . .166

Lecture 23. Sex and Marital Stability amid Role Changes . . . . . . . . .173

Lecture 24. Narcissism, Intimacy, and the Crisis of Affairs . . . . . . .181

Week IX. Models for Transforming Marriage

Lecture 25. Does Love Have an “Expiration Date”? . . . . . . . . . . . . .191

Lecture 26. Open Marriage and the Problem of Fidelity. . . . . . . . . .198

Lecture 27. Divine Jealousy and the Idolatry of Marriage. . . . . . . . .206

PART FOUR: WATER RIVERS

THE ONTOLOGY OF FRIENDSHIP

Week X. The Philosophy of Friendship

Lecture 28. Being Friends vs. Being Lovers or Kin . . . . . . . . . . . . .216

Lecture 29. Friendship as Mutuality:

Playmates, Workmates, and Soulmates . . . . . . . . . . . . . .222

Lecture 30. Friendship Ethics: Loving Persons as Ends in Themselves 229

Week XI. Obeying the Friendship Command

Lecture 31. Charity as Friendship with God and Neighbor . . . . . . . .236

Lecture 32. How Can Love Be Commanded?. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .242

Lecture 33. Religion as a Community of Solitary Friends. . . . . . . . .249

Week XII. Friendship as the Heart of Love

Lecture 34. The Transformation of Sexuality in Friendship . . . . . . .257

Lecture 35. Marriage, Polyfidelity, and Intimacy’s Limits . . . . . . . .264

Lecture 36. Philopsychy as Conversation between Friends . . . . . . . .272

Bibliography: Key to Abbreviations . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .280

Glossary . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .283

Index of Names . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .288

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